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06:12 pm
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japanese mistakes you don't want to make
This is from the latest JList newsletter, always amusing, if often inaccurate/misleading:-
I feel bad about these lapses, although I know that I've given as good as I got, providing my Japanese hosts with many hours of amusement thanks to my own language slip-ups over the years, like the time I tried to order some mango juice, and, er, nevermind, it's a long story.
It took me a few seconds to get. Now I don't want to explain... Just remember that foreigners often have problems distinguishing clearly between a syllable with a diacritic and a syllable without. That's all the explanation I'm giving you. :-p
It reminds me of a time when I was out with the other oxbridge grads studying with me up in Fukuoka. It was probably in our first month there. Time came to leave the restaurant/izakaya. One of the others - I know which, but I'm not telling - decided to ask for the bill, something we should all be able to do no problem. She must have been a little the worse for alcohol, because "kanojo wo kudasai" popped out of her mouth - something like "a girlfriend, please", or "give me her, please". She meant kanjou, rather than kanojo - and apparently knew the moment she said it. It was probably deliberate.
Later we sometimes deliberately asked for a 'kanchou', or an enema, to get the staff to laugh. That's our story and we're sticking to it.
The JList guy's error is 'rude'r.
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05:54 pm
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"scream out love at the centre of the world"
that's a rough translation of the title of the novel i just finished reading this afternoon。 the book is about four years old and is one of the most popular in recent times， no doubt in part because it was serialised as a television drama。
the japanese title is 「世界の中心で、愛をさけぶ」， it was written by 片山恭一 (katayama kyouichi)。 the story is told as the memories of a boy about a girl he knew for two years from when they were fifteen。 just after her seventeenth birthday， the girl dies from leukemia。 the novel is told as one sweet beautifully written story after another， it had me smiling pretty much the whole way through。 it is a very sad story， and the narrator is sad to the point of self-pitying at times， but the main impression left is those sweet and happy memories。 i have always liked bittersweet stories and this book is bittersweetness at its best。
definitely recommended to anyone who can read japanese。 an easy five golden yaks。
i received the book as a birthday present last year。 i struggled through maybe five pages around that time and moved on to more productive activities。 then again one week last november， i struggled not quite so hard through another forty or so pages， and stopped once again。 yesterday morning i started on page 46 and read to page 158 by the time i went home。 this afternoon after lunch， i finished the last 48 pages。 how is this possible？！
i have done very little actual japanese study - although i obviously read a fair amount of news for other purposes， watch tv， talk to people and whatnot - in the last three months， yet my speed and ease of reading has moved ahead that much。 it would be hard to credit， if i hadn't just seen myself do it。 who knows， maybe in another year i'll be able to read a book through without having to look up even those two or three words a page。
for my first year or two， i studied and studied hard。 now i don't find much time for specific japanese study and yet i seem to be learning faster than ever。 i'm sure that there is there is something odd about this。
Current Mood:  tired
Current Music: [none]
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06:55 pm
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when kanji goes wrong
this amused me：
斤 (kin) means a unit of weight, about 600 grams. But if you add one line, 丘 it turns into a hill (saka) . A 600 gram hill?? Better yet, give the hill some “animal legs” and . . . poof! The hill turns into 兵 (hei); a soldier. Just like in real life! Kanji is starting to make sense to me. Get the soldier wet with water, and presto! 浜 he turns into a beach!! (hama) . . . and that is just the kanji which I have learned so far -- I’m pretty sure if I knew more kanji I could turn him into a platypus, the Chrysler Building, or a ziggurat with a cherry on top! he has a fair few other examples of silly kanji on that page。 i think i might try out that "ayamaru" sketch：
another example-- 誤る means to make a mistake, and is pronounced “ayamaru”. 謝る means to apologize, and is also convieniently pronounced “ayamaru.”
Which could lead to the following amusingly Abbot-And-Costelloish scenario;
A-san: (pointing to spilled coffee) Hey dingbat, you just ayamaru-ed!
B-san: Yeah, I guess so. What do you want me to do about it?
A-san : I want you to ayamaru!
B-san (spills more coffee)
(repeat) if i use it， i will of course do so in translated form。
the guy who wrote the page was obviously a beginner when he wrote it， or at times deliberately twisted things to force a joke， but that doesn't detract much from the funny。 i wouldn't use that page as a kanji dictionary if i were you！
[lead from someone over here， where i have put a brief explanation for why another kanji got that way， which some may find amusing]
Current Mood: tired
Current Music: Meatloaf - Life Is A Lemon
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09:26 am
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new translated lyrics
i keep on forgetting to mention these， so there are now five new translated songs up on my site。 "all the things she said" by tatu， "dressed for success" by roxette， "perfect day" by 29 different groups， "dreamer" by ozzy osbourne and "day and night" by billie piper。 you can see my other song translations here。 enjoy。
i also have another being looked over， that'll probably appear sometime next week。 that and the billie one are much harder to translate that most of what i've been choosing so far： difficult words are easy to translate if you have a dictionary， whereas everyday idioms related to relationships take much greater knowledge。
i'm now getting so that i can do even that， so maybe you'll start to get more of my favourite songs， rather than just songs i like that easier to translate。 when i listen to music nowadays， i tend stop on little phrases that i wonder if i can translate。 it is those songs that i then translate。
Current Mood: tired
Current Music: Kylie Minogue - Your Disco Needs You
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10:37 pm
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kanji typos, most amusing
a short article about funny kanji typos， done in such a way that even you no japanese speakers should get a laugh：
People who input Japanese on personal computers or cell phones do not enjoy the luxury of a spell checker. While inputting text in hiragana characters, typists of homonym-heavy Japanese are frequently required to confirm which conversion into kanji communicates their intended message. The user does this by choosing from two or more possible kanji manifestations of the hiragana version.
Inputting いなかにかえる (Inaka ni kaeru), and then not checking the conversion carefully, could result in informing a friend, 胃中に蛙 (“There’s a frog in my stomach”), when what you really meant to say was, 田舎に帰る (“I’m going home to the countryside”). Both sentences are pronounced “Inaka ni kaeru.”
This mistaken phrase is just one of the nearly 6,000 real-life examples submitted to the first annual Kanji Typo Contest, sponsored by the Japan Kanji Aptitude Testing Foundation
i think my favourite is the miniskirt one。
Current Mood: tired
Current Music: Secretly
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10:41 am
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unique words, foreign in japanese
there's a new book out of words that can't be said easily in english：
Did you know that people in Bolivia have a word that means I was rather too drunk last night and it's all their fault? Or that the Albanians have twenty-seven words for moustache? Or that the Dutch word for skimming stones is plimpplamppletteren? Drawing on the collective wisdom of over 280 languages, this intriguing book is arranged by theme so that you can compare attitudes all over the world to such subjects as food, the human body and the battle of the sexes. Here you can find not only those words for which there is no direct counterpart in English (such as pana po'o in Hawaiian - to scratch your head in order to remember something important), but also those that sound confusingly the same (gin in Turkish means to dry out). Oh, and tingo is a Pascuense word from the Easter Islands meaning to borrow things from a friend's house one by one until there's nothing left.
the beeb have an item with more examples， including "The Japanese have bakku-shan - a girl who appears pretty from behind but not from the front." having never heard of this word， and suspecting it wasn't entirely japanese， i looked it up。
it seems that it is a japanese made mixture of english and german： the "bakku" is obviously "back"， and the "shan" is a shortening of the german word for beautiful， "schön"。 the japanese do this sort of thing a lot： make up words using words from other languages， although usually they only use one language。 most of them seem to believe that all of these words are actually english and get confused when white people， whether english speaking or not， don't understand them。
the other bit of japanese in that article is mis-described：
While English speakers have to describe the action of laughing so much that one side of your abdomen hurts (hardly an economical phrase), the Japanese have the much more efficient expression: katahara itai.
片腹痛い literally means "one-side stomach hurts"。 its usage is "ridiculous"/"absurd"。 it does not describe the action， but the cause。 there are no doubt many misunderstandings like the above in the book， but this won't stop it being amusing。
Current Mood: tired
Current Music: [none]
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| 10:13 am
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japanese students writing english
every saturday and monday i mark the daily diaries for the first year high school students in my form rooms (i'm a sub-form room teacher for two classes)。 on those days they are supposed to write them in english。 there are always a few amusing ones。
there are a few basic errors that always crop up：- missing out personal pronouns： "today is tired"， rather than "today， i was tired"。
- using the present tense when looking back on the day - cf the first example。
- using 'could' inappropriately： "today i could study"， rather than "today i studied"。
- missing 'the'/'a'。
- missing plurals。
all of these are a direct result of differences between english and japanese and are standard to all japanese people learning english。
once they learn these errors， some of them start to overcompensate at which point you start getting really amusing entries。 today's gem from one of the boys：
"Today, I am very hard."
i gave him a translation：
今日は僕（のチンポ）がとても硬い！
Current Mood: tired
Current Music: [none]
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06:47 pm
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the oil situation in japanese
i wrote a japanese sentence a school today， for reasons i can't tell for a few months (i shouldn't really be putting this here at all)。 anyway， it is a single sentence and a damn complex one at that， thus i was expecting to get heavy corrections when i took it for checking。 instead i had one word - meaning 'or' - that needed changing because the nuance was slightly wrong， and was told "perfect" lots of times！
yet again， my 'sudden' new found ability comes as rather a surprise。 here's the sentence， with the word corrected (for those interested： i originally had それとも instead of 又は at the end )：
農場を経営するにも、食糧を農場から人々に配布するにも、住宅を暖めるにも、石油がたくさん必要ので、石油がなくなる前に準備しないと、多くの人々は、食糧がないため、又は自分を暖められないため、死ぬだろうと筆者は思う。
rough meaning：
because large amounts of oil are needed to run a farm， to distribute food from the farms to the people and to heat houses， the writer [me] thinks that if we do not make preparations before the oil runs out， many people will die due to lack of food and inability to keep themselves warm。
reading：
nou-jou o kei-ei su-ru ni mo， shoku-ryou o nou-jou ka-ra hito-bito ni hai-fu su-ru ni mo， juu-taku o atata-me-ru ni mo， seki-yuu ga ta-ku-sa-n hitsu-you no de， seki-yuu ga na-ku na-ru mae ni jun-bi shi-na-i to， oo-ku no hito-bito wa， shoku-ryou ga na-i ta-me， mata wa ji-bun o atata-me-ra-re-na-i ta-me， shi-nu da-ro-u to his-sha wa omo-u。
Current Mood: tired
Current Music: Judas Priest - Painkiller
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09:49 pm
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wooohoooooooo!
today i finished reading my first japanese book： a three hundred and forty page autobiography of the world's best violinmaker。 in fact， he is probably the best violinmaker in the last three hundred or so years； he may even be the best ever。 despite which， it is unlikely that any of you have heard of jin chan hyun (陳昌鉉) unless you are a violinist， or otherwise involved in that world。
this is a man who has lived。 a man with a attitude to living that many would do well to learn from。 a man with a mission， neither afraid to take risks， nor unwilling to work hard。 a man who， at the age of twenty-five， bet his life on his ability to solve a problem the world's best minds described as "impossible"， and won。
this is a man whose single-minded quest to rediscover the lost arts of stradivarius， and the other great violinmakers of eighteenth century cremona， has taken him to a hundred and nineteen countries in search of raw materials， sounds and ideas。
a man who grew up in japanese ruled korea； moved to japan on his own at age twelve； lived through world war two working the coal industry for his daily bread while going through night school。 a man whose hard work and willingness to learn english allowed him to quickly and repeatedly get to earn ten or more times his peers' salaries， whether working reconstructing japan after the war， ferrying american soldiers on rickshaws around tokyo， in the forestry industry， carting gravel from a dam， or in the end by making violins， a single one of which now goes for three or four times my annual salary。
this is a korean who has prospered in japan， despite the still extant racism and discrimination， although not without long years of serious hardship。 racism that forced him to learn step by bloody step on his own， via long experimentation and going to see (and lick！) every great violin brought to japan on tour。
a man with stories of worlds all but gone， in both japan and korea。 stories of korea under japanese rule， corrupt local realities of the korea war and both communist dictatorship and pak dictatorship。 a man whose own brother got him tortured by the south korean secret police with barefaced lies， and survived to tell the tale。
it is a book packed with story after story from a man whose hard work， obsession， humour， curiousity and zest shines through every page。 it is a book that will make you laugh， inspire you， and inform you on some pretty esoteric subjects， like the call of the earthworm！ it even has a very sweet love story in the middle。
the only thing stopping me giving this book a wholehearted recommendation is that it is not in english - for that you will have to wait until i get a translation published。
in the meanwhile， i'm twenty pages through my next book： this one a short primer on japanese politics。 yet another in a series of books that just happens to have been published just a couple of months before i 'need' them。 the book is aimed at persuading the japanese sheep that politics is intricately intertwined in their lives whether they like it or not， that the ostrich position is neither sane nor honourable， and at explaining how to become a citizen in more than just name。
it is nothing new to me， nor to any informed westerner， but it is pretty radical for japan： the japanese are still in the process of adjusting to this whole "democracy" thing。 that such a book has been published is both a sign of progress and a sign of just how far this country， that has been ruled by one party for most of the last sixty years and where over ninety percent of the accused are convicted， has to go before it approaches even america's limited democracy。
one can't help but be amused at the ignorance of those bemoaning the 'quagmire' and futility of the coalition of the willing's work in iraq， including uncoincidentally the help of that work in progress known as japan。
this last month i have also been reading rather a lot in english too， just not the usual current affairs： i'm now almost at the end of a second book on environmental politics， part way through two books on american presidential history， and just starting a history of the oil industry。
。。 this along with my main， and growing， preoccupation for the last five or more years： deciding precisely what suitably herculean task i will bet my life on。 i feel it is getting closer and closer to the time i must place my bet and run whither that river may flow。
so far， i have just let fortuna take me wherever she wills， but there comes a point where one must stop drifting and start driving， at least if one wishes to be more than just one more pointless waste of space and time that is the chosen lot of the vast majority of humanity。
as it says on my page of zen graffiti：
there are many paths to truth, don't die choosing.
Current Mood: tired
Current Music: nippy tv
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